Long Weekend; Anniversary

Columbus Day weekend- no school Monday.

Christopher Columbus "discovered" America. As I told my students, you can not discover somewhere where other people exist. His voyages began the exploration of this half of the world, where cultures were already thriving, leading to the European colonization of the Americas and eventual permanent settlements, leading to conquest.
We, as Americans, should be grateful to him for his explorations, but to celebrate his "discovery" is a bit exaggerated.

Classes this week: good and bad- mostly in the middle somewhere. Sad that I was looking forward to the weekend.
Friday, "treat day" for teachers. I made lasagnas, bread, fudge, and carrot cake. Everyone on the team made a lot of food. Nice to see it was all pretty much gone by the end of the day. It was pointed out that I was actually on the wrong "treat team," so I will be doing it again in January.
Quiz 3 for my classes on Friday as well. I gave my students the study guide on Monday, thinking that they would take the advantage. Sadly, grades thus far are par to course- those what always do well, performed better, whereas those who do poorly demonstrated the same.
Spanish Club social activity (movie) on Thursday. We watched Curious George in Spanish (English subtitles). Activity went well. Students organized and sane and watched the movie. I was able to get a bit of work done. Clean up was no problem.
No meeting with Swords about my observation (last week). I assume everything was fine.
Some student issues, but typical of the age. Being more than a month into the school year, I would think that the students know my expectations of reactions to particular behaviors. A few students are at the 5th step already- instant referrals. Funny how some of most problematic are very good students, whereas those tanking the class are quiet.
Need to get ideas going for "Dia de los muertos" (Nov. 1 & 2- Thursday and Friday). I have a project for Spanish Club- skull maracas, but nothing for my classes. I will do a cultural presentation on one of the days. I am thinking a fiesta is appropriate for the other, but I will have to see.
Otherwise, I am still behind in coursework, comparative to the classes across the street. Quarter ends in a couple of weeks. I need to come up with some assessment, using the department exam as a guide. Particularly with my 8th graders, I will not rush through material for the sake of the schedule. I know that I need to pick up the pace, but I will not place my students at a disadvantage. Of course, I must concede eventually and acknowledge that some students just do not study the material.

Fall irises blooming (white).
"Indian Summer" began Thursday, and the 80s will continue through Monday. Staying in the 60s at night.
Lots of work to do in the gardens- long list of things not completed over the summer. Hope to get at least two beds cleaned out this weekend.

Mom returned from Monroe (visiting grandma). I guess she is not doing so well. Too me, it sounds like she is becoming more affected by age, not necessarily by illness or lack of capacities, with aches and pains. Her mind is sharp. I have not noticed anything when I speak with her on the phone. Perhaps we will go down over Thanksgiving.

Anniversary weekend. Ten years.
What can be said; what has already been said. What defines "love" and what does not?
Happiness is a relative term; There is something to be said about history and companionship.

To David:

To think of my task is chilling.
To know i was carefully building the mask i was wearing for two years, swearing i'd tear it off.
I've sat in the dark explaining to myself that i'm straining too hard for feelings i ought to find easily.
Called myself jezebel.
I don't believe.

Before i say that the vows we made weigh like a stone in my heart.
Family is family, don't let this tear us apart.

You lie there, an innocent baby.
I feel like the thief who is raiding your home, entering and breaking and taking in every room.
I know your feelings are tender and that inside you the embers still glow.
But i'm a shadow, i'm only a bed of blackened coal.
Call myself jezebel for wanting to leave.

I'm not saying i'm replacing love for some other word to describe the sacred tie that bound me to you.
I'm just saying we've mistaken one for thousands of words.
And for that mistake, i've caused you such pain that i damn that word.
I've no more ways to hide that i'm a desolate and empty, hollow place inside.

I'm not saying i'm replacing love for some other word to describe the sacred tie that bound me to you.
I'm not saying love's a plaything.
No, it's a powerful word, inspired by strong desire to bind myself to you.
How i wish that we never had tried to be man and his wife, to weave our lives into a blindfold over both our eyes.

Jezebel, 10,000 Maniacs, Our Time in Eden (1992)

I hate this mode.
There are things I want to do, things I know I should do, but there is a lack of strength and desire.
I must realize that I am not getting any younger, that David and I are not necessarily happy people, and that, eventually, I will look back on life with many regrets.
So I need to choose a direction and just move forward, without hesitation or procrastination.

Unlike today, with already three hours wasted.
I need to get moving......