On-Off Cycle

Productive days, then non-productive days.
I have my project/ TTD list; It is the follow-though that becomes the issue. Not that I am totally slacking, but I wish I could get myself moving a bit quicker.

One step at a time- at least it is movement.

Continuing in the garden.
I move away from the west beds, instead, working on the smaller bed by the parking area. I felt that I need a couple of "little victories" and then I will return to the larger beds. After this bed, I will work on the fence.
Like last year, the back patio is filling up with plants.
Unlike last year, I do not want to plant things at the end of the season to just get it in the ground.

When the rain arrived, I worked on the main computer (cleaning it out). Took a while, but I think performance improved. I had things on there from years ago. Ironic, I find it faster than my laptop (being 11 years old).

The rain yesterday was a nuisance: quick, not much at all. But a good storm hit last night. 40% of more this afternoon.

After I get my ass to the gym, I will continue in the yard.

I don't know why the gym is such a big issue. If I make it my #1 priority- something that should be easy; if I do nothing else, at the very least I go to the gym- it is just too much pressure.

Bottom line is really this:
I feel better when I go. My mind is clear, mood is better.
I need to get into the habit (time management is another issue to work on this summer).

Heath and David had a little project last night: spying on Robin (Heath's wife). He suspects she is cheating on him (this would be the second time- email, text messages), so, after telling Robin he was going out of town, the two of them followed her after work. They lost her for a bit, but she went home.
Not that I am an angel, or that David and I are perfect, but Heath needs to make decisions about his marriage. Frankly, I never thought she was much of anything, but Heath is somewhat social inept and probably pussy-whipped.

To me, spying only makes it worse.

When David told me about their night, he repeated "tolerating behavior." Interesting.

Last summer, we had a big talk about our relationship. Not that it was an all-enveloping discussion, but a few realities were brought to the surface- in the end, honestly, nothing changed, and I sometimes struggle with various aspects. If I think about it too much, I just get more irritated, so I just ignore it. Perhaps I've developed an disassociation.

Otherwise, I'm just kind-of chugging along; going with the flow.
Enough to do to keep me busy (which is sometimes a headache), but I am enjoying my summer break.

Week 03- Working in the Garden

Vegetable bed cleaned out. Took about a week- more or less.
Planted/ transplanted the raspberry bushes and the rhubarb (hopefully, they will all survive- a few are worrisome). David said it is too late to plant veggies, so I think I will just get some annual flower seeds (cheaper anyway).
I have a handful of packs laying around that I will try: cosmos, carpet rose, california poppy. Or maybe I will just save for next year- I do not have to plant anything; I have plenty of other things to do!

Lilies beginning to bloom.
Lots and lots of orange daylilies and asiatics.
I think I am just going to trans/mass-plant the daylilies in the west garden bed, perhaps again in the east (I have so many). At least to get them in the ground.

I work out a plan (of sorts) of what needs to be done this summer in the gardens. Really, there is so much work, I am not sure what I will be able to get done. It will be slow; The perimeter beds are the priority (mixing in other quick-clean beds). And then there are the mosquitoes, adding another nuisance to the process.

Rain/ storms the next few days, so I will be working on indoor projects.

Finally, I made my big TTD list for summer, and then doing daily lists as well. Although I am accomplishing things, the process could be quicker if I did not procrastinate so much and find other things to do (like blogging).

And I really have a lot to do.
Not sure how to prioritize, but categorized. Will I get it all done? Probably not. But anything is progress.

I've been avoiding the self-help books- been there before. I know what I have to do; the issue is just doing it. We shall see.

Otherwise.....
Interesting JCPenny commercial. I have not see it on TV. Obviously, a lure to attract a younger demographic.



Another interesting commercial- for Remington 2000 shaver. This one is UK only.



Well, things to do.
Where to start?!

A few hours later......

Sad really. Just being lazy.
Unproductive.

A bit overwhelmed with my TTD list? Perhaps.

I need to focus!!!

Picnic

Foreign Language/ International Club picnic yesterday. Not many members/ students, but as expected; A handful of parents and Martha came as well:
Mike (and parents)
Jill (and mother)
Evan
Andrew
Cassidy (and mother)
Megan

Overall, a very nice day. I brought Eva. Weather was perfect (I feared rain). Mr. Roach worked the grill; Ms. Roach did a lot of work for the event.

I should have brought my camera (portfolio), but Mr. Roach took a few pix.

To me, it was just nice to see the kids over the summer.

Otherwise.....
Leaning towards lazy (not a good thing). I have this list of TTDs and the desire comes and goes.

Summer continues- week 2 (?)

The days seem to blur a bit- probably the redundancy of the days (always working in the garden). But things have been productive: gym more "on" than "off" (although today is a wash), and work in the garden is S-L-O-W-L-Y progressing. Really, it is all such a mess.
Procrastination comes and goes- i.e. today, up for three hours and not done anything.

Last weekend, I put a sign out for free plants and had a handful of people stop by. I will do it again in a couple of weeks when I get more dug out. People surprised that I am just giving the plants away; grateful, but surprised. I found it interesting to be on the other side of the action, as I am often the receiver.

Monday and Tuesday, I went to the TPRS workshop and stayed at Mom's house.
Her house, once again, is a total mess. With all of the dust and smoke and dander, I was having trouble breathing (especially the first night- could not sleep). I need to plan a cleaning day.
The workshop was OK, not great- I thought it would be something more. I got pretty much everything I was going to get out of it on the first day; the second day was more-or-less a repeat/ continuation of the prior day.
Blaine Ray (in photo), the creator of the TPRS method, ran the workshop. It was good to learn the system from the creator- although, his presentation reminded me of a teacher who has taught the subject too long (ill prepared, forgetting things/ backtracking, a bit aloof).
We (me, Mom, Kathy, and Cheryl) had dinner at Maggiano's. Nice time.

So, the garden: I've been working in the vegetable garden (no veggies). Lots of weeds and grasses to pull. Slow process, but getting there. Maybe veggies this summer, maybe not. I thought I would focus my attention on the perimeter (did not get to last year) and work my way in. The interior gardens are not too bad; the outer gardens need the attention desperately!
Stellas blooming. Others ready to start.

This weekend is the Spanish Club picnic in Freeport. Not sure how it is going to go. Not many RSVPs and it may rain. Mary Roach (Mike's mom) has been a big help.

So I get this email from Justin; he and Kevin had their baby. The last I heard from him (months ago) was that they were looking for a surrogate. I do not know if they had found one or if they adopted.
Jealous? Of course. I really wanted to adopt, but in the end, it was just not the thing to do.

To me, it is another 'reality slap' of, once again, a personal desire changed due to my relationship with David. I mean, really, how much do I have to give up for him?
On the other hand, I am returning to Spain, which I know irks him. So some battles I will win.

To me, it is all about a promise. Good or bad, there was a promise. Perhaps a bit of a romantic idealization, but nevertheless, it is a promise to keep.

Rain continues; Humidity

Slow work in the garden this week- weather has not been favorable. A bit here and there really. There is just so much to do, I often get side-tracked with another area.
This week....
1. Worked a bit on the vegetable garden (although no vegetables), excavating the corner and moving the cactus and strawberries. I feel a bit bad for our neighbor, looking at such a mess out of his back window.
2. Worked on the berm around the big tree.
3. Cleaned up the wood pile, moving plants into the space.
4. Planted new plants (still have more) AND a growing stock of transplants... like last summer.

Weeding and lots of weeding. I've been putting mulch down after to deter more weeds. 20 bags thus far, only a fraction of what I will need. Maybe next year I will order in bulk.

Still, TONS TO DO!

Humidity has been an issue- 83 degrees, but heat index ten degrees higher. Sometimes it is really thick to breathe. Indoor vs. outdoor can be a world of difference.

The heat, wet, and humidity has brought on a huge amount of mosquitoes. Normally, I probably would not be so concerned, but West Nile virus is here in Boone and Winnebago counties.
I found a few dead birds in the yard a couple weeks back, but there is a hawk that comes around.

Today, after more rain, I've been lazy. Not much I can do outside; ground too wet, more rain in the forecast (seems to go around Rockford for the most part).

Been going to the gym in the AM (but not today) and doing very well tackling some things on my TTD list (again, not today).

I have plenty to do.
Outdoor list for nice days; indoor list for days like today: cleaning up the house, schedules, organizing.

Let's begin.

Rain and More Rain

Well, the rain began Friday, maybe Thursday, and we have just had a ton and more is on the way. Thunderstorm warnings and watches- tornado went through Cook county yesterday. Rain and rain and rain.

Not that I'm complaining, really; we've had a wet winter and spring, which I believe has had a wonderful affect on the gardens. But the humidity is troublesome- 70%, 80%. When I mowed the lawn yesterday (it needed it!) around noon, the heat index was 98 (10 degrees higher than the temperature). I was having issues with the heat.

There is not much I can do outside with weather like this, although the gardens are desperate.

So what will this summer bring?
This weekend, I am taking care of a few things, but otherwise, just relaxing.
I am going to work on my "lists" for the season; schedules, plans, etc. Of course, I have a ton of things to do and then things I want to do.

I would like to see Dad and Grandmother, but with the price of gas, I do not see it. In addition, I have to consider Candi's health- she is really not fit for travel. I guess I could fly, but that would be a whole other set of headaches (current problems with airline industry).

Viajero (Spain travelers) meeting tomorrow evening in Freeport.
TPRS workshops the 16th and 17th; I'm staying at Mom's house.

Plenty to do around the house: gardens & yard; garage; every room needs some sort of attention (organization) and a good clean. I really need to organize the basement and garage with shelving and storage containers. Then I can deal with the aesthetics.

Personal things: weight (ballooned); gym (why is this such a struggle?); quit smoking (I'm going to try a different way); maybe begin therapy again (I feel 40 is looming like a vulture); David.

So, that is it for today.
I really have to get things moving.

Summer, summer

Final day today: final clean-up of room, paperwork, etc.
I do not have to go in on Monday.

So how was it?
Well, I am going to work on my end-of-year reflection over the weekend.
Overall, I think it went well.

As for summer....
My mind is still working on the list.